Life often happens in waves. We had some beautiful spring- like days this week and went to the beach! No wind made it so peaceful. The waves were lapping the shore and some of my grandchildren actually took off their shoes, rolled up their pants and waded in. I have been at this same beach under very different circumstances. Instead of the peaceful lapping of the waves, they came crashing in so strong that people in wet suits were surfing them!
These past few weeks I admit I have been struggling to gain my footing–my weakness showed up as I kept receiving “difficult and sad/bad news” from many different areas. I felt the waves crashing over me, almost like I was drowning. I knew there was a solid rock under my feet. I knew His love was holding me, caring for me, healing me–some where inside my spirit. I still trusted Him. But as I tried to help, encourage, hold steady those with the “difficult, sad/bad news” my eyes became focused on their stories instead of His story. As I crashed into the waves I drank the salt/bitter water, I got sand in my eyes instead of focusing on Him, instead of feeling His warm robe of righteousness I felt a cold dripping mess. Thankfully, by His grace and His love I am back on the solid rock–trusting these “difficult, sad/bad stories” have the hope of His intervention. He is washing the sand from my eyes, I am drinking from His well and wearing the robe of righteousness He so graciously provides. The storms of my family and friends are real, difficult and overwhelming at times. But I am so grateful that He is not overwhelmed by them. He has a plan.
I also retired this week. I retired from being Mighty Mouse! For those of you too young to remember it was a cartoon from 1942 to 1961. Part of the theme song was “Here I come to save the day!”. That is not my job. We have a very qualified, powerful Savior and I am not him. I was not even aware that I had taken on this role–but thankfully the Holy Spirit let me know! Spending time praying in the Spirit, worshiping Him and extra time in the Word is bringing me out into a faith full place once again. Humbling to be sure!
Darryl Rodman wrote in His book Heart Treasure: “When we are weak we need to believe that God will come to us where we are in His strength, and take us to where He is calling us. We are not to vainly try to climb up out of the weakness we are in, but to invite Him to come where we are in our weakness, so that He can lift us up and out and establish us in His strength by His grace.” This is why it takes faith to embrace our weakness as an opportunity to actually become stronger in our weaker areas. When multitudes of “difficult,sad/bad news” comes, I will take the time I need to make sure my footing is on His solid rock. But I do know if I fall into the sea again, He will lift me up, dry me off and still love me. Thankfully, I do not fall into the sea as much as I used to–or for the same reasons. Learning and growing is my heart cry.
I am grateful for patient friends and leaders who when I fall into the sea they are also patient, caring and forgiving. We need each other.