What a wonderful gift God has given to us–His Grace.  As a child I would hear messages which included the word  grace  and the definition given would be something like God’s unmerited favor , or God’s love in action towards men who merited the opposite of love. I would hear these definitions, but really not grasp in any practical way, what it meant to me.  Then one day His grace revealed its truth to my heart, not just my head.

One day, many years ago, I was struggling in my walk with the Lord.  I was faithful in my Bible reading, prayer, church attendance (in fact I was the Pastor’s wife!) But I still struggled in accepting God’s love and trying to sort out His expectations of me.  In my dark hours, I would call out to the Lord, asking for His help.

Unexpectedly, His help came in the form of our friend, Pastor Gary Matsdorf’s teaching on grace.  His definition of grace “God doing for you what you could not do for yourself” brought a powerful revelation to me.  During this time, the Holy Spirit revealed to me just how desperate I was for the redemption power of God. I had received Jesus as my Savior as a nine year old.  I knew I was “saved”.  But He revealed that my old sin nature was as dark and deceitful as what/who the greatest sin or sinner had ever done.  Due to my upbringing and personality, I was (in the world’s) eyes, a decent human being.  I knew that I did not meet up to His standard of perfection or holiness, but somehow I think I thought unconsciously, I only needed some of the work on the cross to save me, not all of it.  When He showed me that my sin nature, if  left unchecked I could equal a Jeffery Dahlmer (serial killer) or any thief etc. I was set free.  I did not have to be “good enough” to be adopted into the family.  By accepting  His finished work on the cross I was freed from that struggle.  It was a defining moment in my Christian walk.  I felt free, accepted and loved.  The truth of Romans 8:7, “for the carnal mind is enmity against God: for it is not subject to the law of God, neither indeed can be.” became a reality for me.

This is definitely something we have to receive by faith.  I more fully understand the unmerited  favor now, but I so appreciate Gary’s definition and how the Lord used it to bring freedom into my life, in a way I desperately needed.  At the time, I did not know what I needed.  What a relief, God did.  He brought the answer to me.  He will bring any answer you need, as you call out and wait for Him….it is why we call it a relationship, not a religion!  I am so glad Jesus saves us from ourselves, by His grace.

At the very end of A Christmas Carol, after Scrooge’s great transformation; the narrator says “He knew how to keep Christmas well”.  The question that came to my mind with Easter soon upon us–what would “keep Easter well” look like?

I think for me,  it must be a balance of remembering the LOVE (for me) that took Jesus, God’s Son to the cross.  The Cost of that Cross (my sin) that was spent for me when He endured the pain and suffering on that cross.  Only then can I celebrate the  resurrection power  that freed me from my sin–so I can live in liberty from that sin.  I believe until we take the time to personalize the reality of His love; the Cost; and the Power of the Resurrection that encompasses  the entire story, we will begin to comprehend and experience the enormous joy and blessing of our new life in Him.

It is often difficult for me to read about the crucifixion, especially the nailing part.  To understand the physical, emotional and spiritual pain our Lord endured for us is overwhelming.  I want to jump straight to the empty tomb.  But I am so thankful our Lord did not do that.  He endured the cross, despising the shame for me.  And for that I am so grateful, humbled and in love with Him.  My parents were very firm in celebrating Easter as the day of Resurrection.  We did not do bunnies, baskets etc. (not debating anything here, just telling our story).   We dressed up in  our finest and one of the most consistent memories year after year was the singing Alfred Ackley’s hymn “I serve a Risen Savior” (also known as He Lives).  The entire congregation would joyfully lift their voices in the reality that He lives. This song epitomizes celebrating the resurrection of Jesus for me, not just on Easter Sunday, but everyday of the year.    We do  serve a risen Savior!  May this reality grow more real every day of our lives.  If you have not heard this song–google it!  The thoughts expressed by this hymn, should help us all “keep Easter well” .

I Serve a Risen Savior (He Lives)

I serve a risen Savior, He’s in the world today

I know that He is living, whatever men may say

I see His hand of mercy, I hear His voice of cheer

And just the time I need Him He’s always near

He lives (He lives) He live (He lived), Christ Jesus lives today

He walks with me and talks with me

Along life’s narrow way;

Chorus:  He lives (He lives), He lives (He lives)  Salvation to impart

You ask me how I know He lives?

He lives within my heart

In all the world around me I see His loving care

And though my heart grows weary I never will despair

I know that He is leading through all the stormy blast

The day of His appearing will come at last

Chorus (He Lives)

Rejoice, rejoice O Christian Lift up your voice and sing

Eternal Hallejuhas  to Jesus Christ, the Kind

The hope of all who seek Him, the Help of all who find

None other is so loving, so good and kind

(Chorus)He lives…

Years ago I met a man, I can’t even remember his name.  He was an older African American man, who had been through a lot.  I think he was in his 80’s or so–at least from my 20 something eyes he seemed REALLY  old.  (Who knows, he might have only been my age now!)  He would often share his testimony, and most always end with this phrase, “Just forty years of steady walking, that is what it takes”.    I realize that it has been forty-eight years since I was baptized in the Holy Spirit.  Wow–what a difference it has made in my life.

What a journey it has been.  I am grateful for the gifts of the Spirit and how they help us access the power of the Holy Spirit and help enable us to walk in the Spirit and not the flesh.  Our Life Group touched on Romans 8: 5 and 6 last night.  Those who are dominated by the sinful nature think about sinful things, but those who are controlled by the Holy Spirt think about things that please the Spirit. So letting your sinful nature control your mind leads to death.  But letting the Spirit control your mind leads to life and peace.  

I admit it is often easier to read this scripture, than it is to apply it especially when we think it is all on us to make it happen.  But it isn’t.  We have the amazing loving Holy Spirit who helps us in our times of weakness.  He comes along side and helps us shift our thinking as we ask Him. Sometimes He speaks to me, quietly, “not good thinking”.  Many times scriptures come to mind and adjustments occur.  At times there is just an awareness that there is a better way.  “What is the most loving thing you could do in this situation?”  Or “are you promoting peace, faith or love here?”  It is amazing what listening and responding to those prompts brings to the situation.  I am still learning how to do this 24/7 in all situations.  I encourage us all, to learn how to walk steady in the Spirit, by the Spirit and life will flow in us and through us touching those around us.

(The picture is my grandson, Jakin.  It was taken about the same age as I was when I became a Christian. I am grateful God knows the paths we all take).

Life often happens in waves.  We had some beautiful spring- like days this week and went to the beach!  No wind made it so peaceful.  The waves were lapping the shore and some of my grandchildren actually took off their shoes, rolled up their pants and waded in.  I have been at this same beach under very different circumstances.  Instead of the peaceful lapping of the waves, they came crashing in so strong that people in wet suits were surfing them!

These past few weeks I admit I have been struggling to gain my footing–my weakness showed up as I kept receiving “difficult and sad/bad news” from many different areas.   I felt the waves crashing over me, almost like I was drowning.  I knew there was a solid rock under my feet.  I knew His love was holding me, caring for me, healing me–some where inside my spirit.  I still trusted Him.  But as I tried to help, encourage, hold steady those with the “difficult, sad/bad news” my eyes became focused on their stories instead of His story.  As I crashed into the waves I drank the salt/bitter water, I got sand in my eyes instead of focusing on Him, instead of feeling His warm robe of righteousness I felt a cold dripping mess.  Thankfully, by His grace and His love I am back on the solid rock–trusting these “difficult, sad/bad stories” have the hope of His intervention. He is washing the sand from my eyes, I am drinking from His well and wearing the robe of righteousness He so graciously provides. The storms of my family and friends are real, difficult and overwhelming at times.  But I am so grateful that He is not overwhelmed by them.  He has a plan.

I also retired this week.  I retired from being Mighty Mouse!  For those of you too young to remember it was a cartoon from 1942 to 1961.  Part of the theme song was “Here I come to save the day!”.  That is not my job.  We have a very qualified, powerful Savior and I am not him.  I was not even aware that I had taken on this role–but thankfully the Holy Spirit let me know!  Spending time praying in the Spirit, worshiping Him and extra time in the Word is bringing me out into a faith full place once again. Humbling to be sure!

Darryl Rodman wrote in His book Heart Treasure:  “When we are weak we need to believe that God will come to us where we are in His strength, and take us to where He is calling us.  We are not to vainly try to climb up out of the weakness we are in, but to invite Him to come where we are in our weakness, so that He can lift us up and out and establish us in His strength by His grace.”  This is why it takes faith to embrace our weakness as an opportunity to actually become stronger in our weaker areas.  When multitudes of “difficult,sad/bad news” comes, I will take the time I need to make sure my footing is on His solid rock. But I do know if I fall into the sea again, He will lift me up, dry me off and still love me.  Thankfully, I do not fall into the sea as much as I used to–or for the same reasons.  Learning and growing is my heart cry.

I am grateful for patient friends and leaders who when I fall into the sea they are also patient, caring and forgiving.  We need each other.

Last week we saw how Moses, God’s man of the hour used open and honest communication when talking to the Lord.  As any leader, he faced joys, sorrows and disappointments with those he led.  Even though the Lord warned him of what his people were doing while he was up on the mountain with God, hearing the people raucously partying while honoring a false idol was too much for him.  His anger caused him to throw down the stone tablets God, himself, had written on.  This leader, in order to preserve God’s reputation argued with God when the Lord wanted to destroy them. Possibly Moses’ discussion with the Lord about not destroying the people was accurate, but at that time more theory and when the reality of the people’s sin, he was overcome.

Loving people in theory is always easy.  Reading instructions in the Bible to feed the hungry, to care for the widows, to take care of the sick is not too difficult.  Reading about how we need to forgive to be forgiven might be a bit more difficult, but in theory it is easy to say yes.

When Moses came down off the mountain he came face to face with the fact his own brother’s character.  Aaron had been his spokesman during the conflict with Pharaoh.  He was his right hand man so to speak.  I am sure they had many conversations about the amazing miracles God did for them.  They shared history.  They shared the triumph of the miracle of the Red Sea.  Let’s speculate that while Moses was up on the mountain, he too had begun to have doubts.  Maybe he began to wonder, suppose something happened to him, and I am going to be the leader?  Perhaps the people voiced his own fears, which is why he quickly collected the gold, oversaw the melting of it and the casting of the mold into the golden calf.  It was Aaron who authorized the celebration of the idol.  (Exodus 32)

We can assume that, when, Moses asked who is on the Lord’s side, Aaron joined Moses.  He probably was part of the Levite team that helped mete out God’s punishment.  We can’t help but wonder what would have happened if Aaron had spoken faith, encouragement to trust the Moses and His God if three thousand people’s lives would have been saved.  Living loved means not forgiving in theory, but in reality.  It is not easy, but the more we know we are loved, the easier it becomes to forgive and love others.

We can learn at least two things from this story.  Our actions matter.  We affect others by our faithful words, or our doubt filled words.  We may be the Aaron for someone who needs to forgive us and our actions, or we may be Moses who continues to lead flawed people.  Probably in our lifetime, we are both.  Let’s keep on living loved and loving the best we can.

 

Like most people, these past few months in my life have had its challenges.  Navigating life, trusting the Lord for myself and others is not always easy or simple.  These life challenges either lead us to Him, or perhaps cause us to take a step or two back wondering if He is the trustworthy  God we want Him to be.  We all experience “bad news”.  This bad news can range from it is going to rain on our picnic, to a loved ones death or serious diagnosis.  How we walk it out depends on our understanding of God and His loving care.  The kind of bad news that shakes our world to its core reveals the status of our trust in His Word and who He is.  I do not have this all figured out–but I do know that He is dependable, trustworthy.  Reading through the book of Exodus, I came to chapter 33.  If you haven’t read that book lately–refresh yourself with its story.

Moses is God’s main man in this part of Israel’s story.  He was somewhat of a reluctant leader, but with the power of God working through him, he led the Israelites out of Egypt toward the Promised Land.  I can only imagine how excited and amazed the first part of the journey was, until the journey became more of a reality and difficulties arose.  We see Moses doing his best to relay God’s plans and direction to these people.  They did not always want to listen–a common problem most leaders encounter from time to time!  Bad news, Moses, the people you are supposed to be leading toward the Lord created an false god and are partying while you have been up on the mountain obeying God’s instruction.  Not a fun day to be Moses.  He was angry, but I do not think it made him happy to watch some of the people be fatally punished.  So how did Moses process this bad day?  He talked with the Lord.  None of us have Moses’s responsibility, but we do have the same access to our God!

I love how the Message Bible describes Moses’ conversation with God.  Exodus 33:12-13 Moses said to God, “Look, you tell me, ‘Lead this people,’ but you don’t let me know whom you’re going to send with me.  You tell me, ‘I know you well and you are special to me.’ If I am so special to oyou, let me in on your plans.  That way, I will continue being special to you.  Don’t forget, this is your people, your responsibility.”

God said, “My presence will go with you.  I’ll see the journey to the end.”  Moses said, “If your presence doesn’t take the lead here, call this trip off right now.  How else will it be known that you’re with me in this, with me and your people?    They continue with this conversation until verse 17. God said to Moses: “All right, Just as you say; this also I will do, for I know you well and you are special to me.  I know you by name.  How amazing is that!  Because He is no respector of persons, He is saying that to each of us.  I know you well.  You are special to me.  I know you by name.  No matter how rough the journey, how difficult your path.  He knows you.  No matter how many weaknesses you are dealing with, He is with you to strengthen you.  As I read those verses, I just sat back and relaxed, refreshed and encouraged by the fact He knows me well.  I can trust Him to take me through the roughest waters or the hottest fires.  Not always in the ways I would like, but the way that will lead to my blessing and the blessing of others.

The next words from Moses were: “Please. Let me see your Glory.”  As we seek to live our lives, not for ourselves, but for Him life gets simpler. God reassurred Moses that He was with him.  He knew him and that motivated Moses even more to want to reflect His love, power and might with others.  Spending time in prayer talking through the hard things with the Lord always brings me closer to Him and with an even greater desire to see His glory revealed.  How about you?

A few nights ago I had a dream.  In the dream somebody was teaching me a different kitchen skill.  I found myself saying after just a few minutes into the lesson, “Oh, I know. I know.  It is OK”.  But in the dream I knew that I really did not know how to do it the way the instructor was teaching me.  I realized pride had reared it’s ugly head.

Unfortunately this is not just something that has happened in dreams.  As I woke and pondered the dream, I realized I have done this in my real life.  Why and when?  Again it was pride that made me want to cover up my “lack” in that area.  When are the situations that this temptation rears its ugly head?  When I think I should already “know” something.  When I am trying to impress someone.  When I am feeling insecure.  Through this dream God began to uncover another area of my weakness.  Philippians 2:3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit.  Rather in humility value others above yourselves.

Wow, I have to confess this covering up of my weak areas fall into both selfish ambition and vain conceit.  By declaring “I know, I know” when I really don’t is actually lying.  It is also robbery.  It robs me of learning something new, and robs the person sharing with me his/her knowledge and the blessing of sharing something they have learned.  I admit, as I let the Holy Spirit unpack these truths how far off the mark or “sin full” it really is, I had to repent.   So thankful for the grace of God and His forgiveness.  What seemed such a simple cover up can impact our lives in subtle and not so subtle ways.  Who knew such a small part of an inconsequential dream could have led to so many insights.  I am grateful and thankful for the Holy Spirit and His ability to communicate with us truths that help bring light into every dark place.

Here are some scriptures about pride that, once again show us how destructive it truly is.

When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.  Proverbs 11:2

Where there is strife, there is pride, but wisdom is found in those who take advice. Proverbs 13:10

Do you see a person wise in their own eyes? There is more hope fora fool than for them.  Proverbs 26:12

Last week I shared about our church’s saying Yes to participate with Tim Tebow”s Foundation outreach “Night to Shine”.  I also shared how I was asked to co-lead the kitchen team, without really understanding the full job description and felt a bit over my head!  In spite of my weakness,  God showed up in some amazing ways!

Before the event I shared with my co-lead Bonnie, that if our “guests” left fed and happy and our kitchen team left happy then we would be successful.  I think both goals were accomplished–not without a few struggles along the way however!  What a joy it was to hear one of our guests exclaim that the brownies were the best she had ever eaten–especially when we struggled to get them baked and cut!  Two volunteers took some of them home to bake–one pan I took out too early thinking it was finished, only to discover after we had filled the oven with frittatas that it wasn’t quite baked through.  He grabbed the pan and took it home and it actually turned out good.  The other gal just did the whole other pan at her home!

Our Thursday morning prep team did such a quick job of cutting the fruits and vegetables that the afternoon volunteers were able to help in some other areas!  One of those areas was to problem solve and plan for the next day and that brought great peace to my mind and heart.  I wish I had taken pictures of our working together.  It truly was an example of many hands making light work. At one point we were two hours from serving and the chicken tenders were not even close to being finished.  I stood at the stove and prayed.  “Lord, we still have two hours to get these all finished.  Please help us figure this out, and multiply the food as we are getting more guests.”  I maybe should not have added that last part, because we had an abundance of food left over!

Sunday, Pastor Michael said he felt like we had about 450 people on campus through out the night.  On the final day we had, I believe 10 more guests sign up–which meant we needed 10 more buddies.  Every guest had a special friend assigned to them.  Each with a completed background check and training.  The administrator of our whole event, Laura, came to each team and asked for volunteers to serve as buddies.  She needed five people from our team (because not only did we register more guests, some of the original buddies came down sick).  I ended up being the runner between our main facility and the respite building for the caregivers.  What a joy to see connections being made with people sharing similar journey’s with their children who have special needs.  The smiles on their faces as I asked several in between my journeys–“are you having a good time?” “Was this worth it for you?”  “Oh yes, yes!”  Was always the reply.  My feet and legs got more of a work out than I planned, but it was so worth it.

We were blessed to have several of our “on the night volunteers” veterans from last years event serve.  They were troopers, standing for hours smiling and serving.  Teleia (our department head), Bonnie and I filled in where we needed.  I learned, once again, the blessing of asking for help, wisdom and the power of a team brain!  The success of the evening fell on the team effort.  There are things we would do differently if there is a next time–we learned a lot.  Again, saying yes as the Lord leads is always worth it.  We did not let fear, frustration or pride keep us from loving on those around us.  Keeping loving attitudes the best we could helped our team stay a team.  “I’m sorry,” “Please forgive me”, “Do you need any help” were phrases that helped us overcome our weaknesses and helped us finish strong.  Love never fails prevailed once again.

It is an exciting week here in Oak Harbor.  Our church is hosting “A Night to Shine” with the Tim Tebow Foundation.  It is large undertaking–needing many volunteers to put on this special “Prom Night” for those with special needs in our community and surrounding area.

Sometime in October I received a phone call asking if I would help co-lead the kitchen team under our church’s office assistant. I had just hung up thirty seconds before, receiving news that my sister had cancer.  She was so gracious–she told me not to worry about it, I could talk to her about it later.  All I could think of, was, I could do this.  I did not ask for a clear job description, but just said “sure, I will do it.”  That was back in October.

The event is this Friday night.  We have been planning, prepping and cooking for about 400 meals.  It is the largest “feed” I have ever done.  I am basically functioning as the chef for the event.  Over my head?  Yep! But due to this focus the last few weeks on weakness, I am actually handling it fairly well.   I am learning to lean on Him even more.    Keeping that perspective has helped me release my faith for God to supply every need we are going to encounter.  So many people are praying for this event and the people who are leading the various teams.  It has given me the courage to step up and do my best, because it is not about me.

During my devotions today I read for I was hungry, and you fed me.  I was thirsty, and you gave me a drink.  I was a stranger, and you invited me into your home.  I was naked, and you gave me clothing.  I was sick and you cared for me.  I was in prison, and you visited me.   Saying yes to Jesus and His assignments is not really about ourselves.  It is about those we serve in His Name.  I do not know if I would have agreed to it if I had really thought it out–too many “I am not able’s, “I do not know how” etc might have prevented me from saying yes.  But by His mercy and grace I said yes, and so have over three hundred other volunteers!  We are privileged to watch God answer prayer.  I see that the Holy Spirit schooling me about weakness has actually strengthened me to do this task. A couple of days ago I woke up in the night with the realization that I forgot to purchase Bisquick.  This led to a conversation with the Lord about perfection and wanting to do things “right”, which of course is good–but also not really attainable.  Another weak area exposed, but it also showed me how to alter my expectations to doing my best, and letting God’s grace and mercy cover the rest.

We have a great team.  Teleia (our head) asked my friend Bonnie to co-lead as well.  Bonnie is a quiet, behind the scenes but amazing get it done kind of gal.  She is “thought full”…in all the amazing ways we need.  The chef from last year, met with us and helped us with how much food we will need, cooking times and shared hints, tips and ideas on how to make it work.   We were able to ask him questions and they became the strength in our weak areas. God’s Word encourages us to learn from those who have gone before.  Pride can make us feel like we have to re-invent everything…so tiring.

To be part of the team, not only do you need a background check, but you are also required to attend one of two training sessions.  During these training times we discovered God sent us people with skills neither Teleia, Bonnie or I have.  I can see how the Holy Spirit has allowed this meditation on weakness, humility and dependency to prepare me to not only trust Him for directions, but to ask others for their help.  Much prayer has gone into this time.  So many teams of people who have never worked together before are willing to serve with strangers with and for a purpose.

The whole event is bigger than anyone person.  For me, personally, I am stretched to trust the Lord for wisdom, grace and insight as we help lead this team.  After praying, I felt to encourage each one to bring their favorite knives or tools so they would feel comfortable with them.   One gal shyly smiled and later admitted she had some serious knife skills!  (We have a lot of fruit and vegetables to prepare!)  Another man shared he had been a chef at a restaurant.  He can’t come for all the prepping, but shared some helpful hints as well.  Bonnie and I prayed that we will be a team in the kitchen, having fun and enjoying each other.  I am looking forward to meeting new people, learning about them and working toward a purpose bigger than ourselves.  All our guests had such a great time last year.  It is our prayer that they are touched again by God’s love and grace, their caregivers are refreshed and encouraged and the volunteers work together in unity.

So, dear friends, do not be afraid to say yes.  Do not be afraid to step out of your comfort zones.  As I was praying the other day, the Lord said, “This is really not about Night To Shine”, it is something I am using to stretch you and give you confidence for something up the road.  Trust me.”  He has given me insight and understanding of how to coordinate the prep work, the plating and the serving.  I still have some blank areas that I am not sure how to do it, but I don’t need to know them yet.   If God is leading you to do something, do it, even if your weakness looms in your face.  Do not be afraid of saying yes to Him.

Part of me hadn’t planned on sharing this before the event, but it seemed to be the right time.  Please pray for, not only Life Church, but for every venue this event is taking place==  16 different countries!  I’ll let you know next week how it went!